taym pers

I cant resist to be bitter now, i dont know why, i dont know how it doesnt matter how hard you try keep that in mind to explain in due time (waaaah kinanta?)hahaha…they say there is nothing wrong for being bitter, rememeber medicines usually taste bitter but it makes you well.

There will always be that first true love, the one you first spent the night crying because of, the one you always thought was stupid but still loved anyway,the one who hurts you so much, the one you most loved that time, the one that never really worked out but you kept your hopes up too much, the one who got away, the one that taught you all you need to know, the one that up until now, is still the one you look back to whenever you try to love again.

-Paul Deng Bed

Its been ahwile since i havent posting my entry here. I was just busy making christmas decor in my house.Anyway how there you? In tagalog kumusta kayo dyan? Me, im fine, i thank you!
christmas is very near coming na and when christmas comes i feel pity to my self because i cant buy some dressesses like shoes and jeans. Im just envy our neighboorhod who have a lot of clothes when christmas is coming to town. They buy so many clothes, and they also have exchanging gifts and cards, the also have christmas tree and christmas light.Me I dont have had any. They have cheese, me only margarine, they have pork but me only MSG but hey they all like pig, so chubby; they have pasalubong from abroad me i am the one who gives pasalubong to my pet, they have new builded house me even faint brush i dont have. But despite all of those things they are not happy which on the other hand i am happy for what i only have.

By the way here is my wishlist this christmas is the following:

1. digital camera
2. PS3
3. new cellphone Nseries
4. Laptop or notebook
5. DSl internet connection
6. Apparels
7. nike shoes
8. trip to boracay
9. iphone
10. and last but not the least… happiness!

Isnt so annoying when you go to mall and a saleslady always ask you… “sir/maam ano pong hanap nila?” why dont you just tell them “kapayapaan at pagkakaisa”, for sure the saleslady will tumbling on your front.bwahahaha

In life there are things youve never thought would have happened. Things you dont want to, things you embraced from the start and in the end it may fall away, things you care but as soon as it has to go you dont have a choice but to. Gone are the days you feel its yours, but in reality it happens to be not. So for every thing what you have now, enjoy and have some value to it for it may soon be gone…

-In memory of… my patay na kuko.

-Paul Deng Bed

yess! umuwi na ako mula sa bakasyon, syetness naman dahil sa sama ng panahon di ako masyadong nakapaglagalag. Namasyal lang naman ako sa bahay ng aking mga mahal kong kaibigan, kumain ng fresh na fresh na inihaw na tilapia na may kasamang toyo’t kalamansi, kumain ng manamis-namis na gulay, naligo sa ulan, at natulog ng ubod ng himbing.

Sapat na ba yun? ‘Di pa, kasi gusto kasi kulang pa.

November 10. Birthday ko,masayang malungkot… masaya kasi nakauwi ako at nagkasama-sama kami ng pamilya ko, malungkot kasi nadagdagan na naman yong pinakaingat-ingatan kong edad. Kung ilan taon na ako? malaking sekreto.

Walang cake. walang kandila. Walang magarbong handaan. Walang kantahan ng hapi bertdey. Walang lobo. Walang regalo. Simpleng simple lang.

sapat na ba yun? Oo, makasama ko lang pamilya ko masaya na ako.

Pero kung may nabalot ka nang regalo para sa maagang pasko, pwede mo naman iyong ibigay para sa akin.walang problema doon.Hehehe

sa humihingi ng picture sa aking nagdaang bakasyon. Ito na yun.

Syempre, ek-ek lang ang picture na yan.

Baka naman naman nakalimutan mo na ako at nasasapawan na ako ni Paul Deng Bed, ako to! oo nga ako to, di nga? limot mo na ba ako? buti naman. kumusta naman kaya yun? Ilang araw din akong di nakapagbigay ng updates sa blog ko, oo alam ko kasalanan ko din e ksi nga busy kasi ang lolo at ang kasalukuyang nagsashayn above the sky itong si Paul Deng Bed e ayoko namang masira ang kanyang engrandeng kinang at ayokong mamura ng kanyang english. Kumusta sya? Di ko alam, nasa Mall of Asia ata naglalaro ng taguan-pong kalaro ang sarili nya.

Anway kelangan kong gawin ang kanyang karakter para sa blog na ito para naman magkaroon ng kulay at saya kahit papaano, kung di ko man mapasaya ang iba atles ang sarili ko napapasaya ko sa hatid na kiliti nitong si paul deng bed.

Uuwi pala ako sa probinsya namin bukas, di kasi ako nakauwi nitong undas dahil sa trabaho. Magbabakasyon ako dun ng tatlong araw…haaayy ang sarap nun. Iwas sa polusyon, ingay, at kompletong tulog. Mamasyal sa kabarkada at makipagkwentuhan na walang humpay kaharap ang mga bote ng serbisa o amoy-chicong inumin,at magpahinga ng todo-todo. whew!

Gusto ko ang magbiskleta, maglakad sa kainitan ng araw, at maligo sa poso kasabay ng mga pinsang makukulit. Gusto kong kumain ng marami na luto ni Inang mother, gusto kong manood sa aming T.V na kelangan munang batukan para magsindi, gusto kong makipaglaro sa pinsan ko, gusto kong maglibot-libot sa aming bakuran, gusto kong magpalipad ng saranggola kahit may nagbabantang bagyo, at higit sa lahat gusto ko nang umuwi!!!!

Haay…. oh my home here i come!

Its been a long time i havent writed here because just nothing i feel lazy, sometimes you will feel like this its not that your brains does not working but your mind prefer to inhibit to do such things. Mind and brain are not the same or alike but they are synonymous together. Its like this; the mind works with the brain but not all brains work with a fine mind.

I am happy to read all the comments asking for more entries to come.

I went to convenient store awhile ago to buy a tobleron chocolate then I saw this kid speaking English so hard with her yaya. Oh my god the kid is so bright and smart. He speaks so well unlike me that in the eye of my neighborhood I look like I am TH (read: trying hard) to them but frankly speaking they don’t understand me. I don’t know if they understand English or  they don’t understand my english… goshhh so insinuating. Oh lets back to the kid, his yaya also know how to speak english, we converse and talk but my nose got bleeds…I felt intimidated.

Before I have only small friends but now I have a lot of friends, because of my english it makes me bida like star without shining (read: bituin walang ningning). I have friendster too and other social-networking websites to gain more friends here and there abroad.

Cherish the people who knows and understand you completely, those who get how you feel and accept who you are, because in the event that you lose yourself, they are the one who knows how to find you…

November 1. Halloween today. You know what when I was a kid, I envy those childrens having their basket on their hands and going to each house and then they were given with candies, chocolates and pesos (coin), I really envy them. Then they have a costume like monster, white ladies, tiyanaks ( im sorry I don’t know the english of that), and other so scary costumes.

One time I planned to do that, I went to our neighborhood and say “trick or threat” and my neighbor got mad and say tang ina mo! di uso yan dito!!! So I runned because he was drunk with that red eyes like a monster. And never attempt to do that again not because of embarrassment but because of I don’t know what and how to do. I was alone kaya, duh?

Last last week I went to a shop to buy a new bag. Its has been my dream to buy such bag, exhibiting to public people of the Philippines that hey I got this bag, hahaha. So finally I have it! but its only a dream of mine. A mere dream.

don’t feel mad whenever you sweet dreams are ruined by waking up. Maybe because that’s how life tell us to wake up from false beliefs and move on to save us from hurting ourselves…

 Lesson: Never sleep if you dont want to dream because mind is all that matters.

–Paul Deng Bed

Thanks to those who dropped thier comments to my last previous entry, to mangbadoy, jomar, dong ho, utakmunggo, buzzing flowerpecker, kengkay, taroogs, joshmarie, i hope we could be friends huh, and for those who dont know me yet i would like to introduce my name to all of you so you can not know me sooner and the future and for your reference as well… I am Paul Deng Bed whose name is unique in any other way around. I grew up where trash most found because i used to be magbobote and i buy and sell those junks i got from trash. I would love to talk to anyone or alone. I dont know my age because i dont know my birthday, i dont have parents because they left me when i was young.

I have a lot of playmates on the street. We play a lot until we feel exhausted. We play tumbang-preso, we play bahay-bahayan and to that game my role is always like a dog of the house. My playmates make me a guard dog to the bahay-bahayan we made. Its okay with me. And a lot of games pa.

How i wish i could turn back the hands time to play those games again, and revert to being young again like madam auring who always thinks she is young even she is not. Duh? with that so shrinky face? In her nightmare! hahaha…

I have this playmate named geisha, so thin, so cryingly, so naughty, so kulit but now he owns a parlor and now gay na sya. haha. I also have this playmate she is so maarte and frank, looks what  she is now… dead na. hahaha, but i am sad because we never play again taguan pong even geisha cheats always, even i am always the taya and hide only ones. I really missed that memorable times of my childhood times.

The moon said to me, “if your frend is not keeping you in touch why dont you leave your her?” I looked back to the moon and said… “does your sky ever leave you when you dont shine?”

P.S to those who hates my english and me, all i can say is crispy words… Pakyu .i.

Its already 8 o clock in the night but still so hot. Thats why i went out to my place to airy my body, i am little bit dehydrating so i drink water so much so the thirst is gone away. If you ever go out this last night and the past you will see the moon so big and bright like a big balls shining above the sky not unless if the moon is covered by the smog caused by the pollution here in the manila and you’re lucky if your in the province to see the big moon.
 
I remembered when i was a kid when i feel sad and alone, i just go out from the kariton-de-tulak to see the moon. Our kareton-de-tulak kasi is quite sosyal, it has a roof but i can not put it with a rooftop because it is to small. Haaay..it reminds me of the simplicity of life and dispair.

By the way just tonight i eat only half rice and one bowl of nido sop because i can not able to buy groceries because the store is already closing when i see it and because i am mad of the guard who is so strict she said beggars are not allowed to enter, duh if she only knows i have money too.

I want to flaunt to the face of our so masungit neighboor to her face my new slippers havaianas, I want it to slap it on her face together with her mother so matapobre who so looks like a dead feet. Anyway i bought my slippers to megamall when it is sale last october 18, so much people buying there.I can not make singit.

I know even im poor i should feel i am rich, with friends, with love, with care, and freedom to live.

–Paul Deng Bed

This is my first time to post my entry here. And I  felt like I am walking in the cloud eating with the  most deliciosly chocolate named cloud 9, I feel great posting. At first when I asked to write I am shy but now not na coz I am stronger now deep inside and outside that I look that. I dont have yet funny stories to tell in english nor in tagalog coz i just woke up, I am still exasperating due to my bad mood yesterday. It was not my day yesterday because my pet dog has gone somewhere else and I dont find him elsewhere, I know he will be backs soon when he wants food or he wants some chocolate too. He was given to me by ate doring pa because she is already have all dogs so many at her house,  oh lets u-turn this ‘usapan’ because it will just make me sad of that things happened to me.You know I missed my pet already and I dont want to talk this thing now.

You know what when I was young like a kid, I haved pets like dogs, cats, birds, white rat or white mice, english of kuneho, worms living in the soil and worms living in my body, lices or kuto, chickens, turtles, frog and I have that so big goat named goatee.hahaha so cute the name no? arent he? I have all of that, our house almost fills with animals and it seemed its a jungle loaded with animals and the kind. I feel liked i was tarzan that time. Im the head of the jungle.

But now because of the poverty caused of pathethic government here in the philippines i have now only one pets and that is my pet dog whos currently missing now. I dont have anything to feed him but only tirs-tirs (tira-tira) of mine. Maybe he gets mad thats why he left me for the mean time and went somewhere else where good foods are abundant. It hurts so much you know. I dont have work, Im just a freelancer magbobote which my earnings are not enough for my needs like going to starbucks or even just at seattles coffee shop. Im so poor now.

Who can I blame of what happenings to me? The government or my self? Haaaay… blame it alls to me. Gaddammit. *hikab*

Word of the day:

•  

  Saigo no kisu wa tabako no flavor ga shita
  Nigakute setsunai kaoriAshita no imagoro ni wa
  Anata wa doko ni irundarou
  Dare wo omotterundarou
  You are always gonna be my love
  Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
  I’ll remember to love you taught me how
  You are always gonna be the one
  Ima wa mada kanashii love song
  Atarashi uta utaeru made

  Tachidomaru jikan ga
  Ugoki dasouto shiteru
  Wasureta kunai kotobakari

  Ashita no imagoro niwa
  Watashi wa kitto naiteru
  Anatawo omotterundarou

  You will always be inside my heart
  Itsumo anata dake no basho ga aru kara
  I hope that I have a place
  in your heart too
  Now and forever you are still the one
  Ima wa mada kanashii love song
  Atarashii uta utaeru made

  You are always gonna be my love
  Itsuka darekato mata koi ni ochitemo
  I’ll remember to love you taught me how
  You are always gonna be the one
  Mada kanashii love song 

  utada-hikaru-first-love 

Who wouldnt love  this song?

-Paul deng Bed

Mahilig ako sa mga suspense thriller na movies, pero takot naman ako kung nandyan na yong mamamatay-tao o halimaw na ubod daming props at kulorete sa katawan.
Showing pa lang yong strangers pero halos isang buwan ko na itong napanoud at HD quality pa. Hiniram ko ito sa ka-officemate ko, pinirata. Pinanood ko na lang sa PSP ko kasi di kaya sa DVD ko, pinirata din mula sa china. Madami pa akong bagong labas na movies,gusto kong i-compile pero di ko alam kung saan ko ilalagay dahil sa gigabyte space nito, kulang na kulang kung sa 8Gb USb thumbdrive.

Ang strangers ay tungkol sa magsyota (ambantot ng word) na sa di malamang kadahilanan e may mga ’strangers’ na gusto silang patayin, sekreto ko na lang muna kung mamatay sila o hindi. Medyo scary nga talaga dahil sa sound effect pero dahil sa english e di ko maintindihan ng husto ang kwento.hahaha

Okey naman ang pagkakagawa ng movie, konti lang ang characters kaya di magulo yong takbo ng estorya.Handa ka lang ng chichirya na pwedeng mangangatngat habang nanonood.

One liner: “hindi lahat ng potato french fries”- mashed potato